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Man blasts 'remarkably stupid' eBay bidder in online rant

'Ladies and gentlemen ... This is how I answer a remarkably stupid question, please enjoy'
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Anyone who has ever listed anything on Kijiji or eBay has experienced this: You state your price, you immediately get inundated with low bids and daft questions.

Occasionally, a clueless buyer pushes the wrong seller just a little too far. When that happens, it is awesome because the seller then unleashes a scalding public tongue-lashing and we all get to read it and say, “Oh snap!”

That’s exactly what happened when a buyer approached the seller of a 1996 Eddie Bauer Bronco, listed on eBay at $25,500.

The ensuing smackdown is featured on Jalopnik, whose writers note the seller was “getting some ridiculous questions” but that it was this one that finally set him off:

Q: Hello, I’m interested in your bronco. I’m worried about financing though because of the model year, can’t get a bank loan on a car this old. Would you consider $9000, I think I could pull that off.

To which the Bronco seller promptly and viciously replies:

A: Ladies and gentlemen for your reading pleasure. This is how I answer a remarkably stupid question, please enjoy. Let me see if I have this correctly. You want me to sell you my Bronco that has a buy it now price of $25,500 for $9,000. Because the most you think that you could pull off is $9,000. You must be a 20 something, in need of rehab, or are mentelly deficient. You obviously didn’t read the entire listing. That states and I quote ” you must have your cash or financing in place if you purchase this vehicle.” Whatever made you think that I would consider dropping my price by almost 65% when other Broncos with twice the mileage are selling between $13,000.00 and $17,000.00. It’s time for you to have a reality check. Not everyone is a winner. Not everyone gets a trophy, and just because you want something doesn’t mean that you can have it. I hope that this isn’t to subtle for you to comprehend. But if it is the answer is NO $9,000.00 won’t buy the Bronco. I have been getting some interesting questions about my Bronco. Most from people who for some reason can’t understand or fully read this listing. So I will attempt to answer for those individuals that lack the capacity to understand. I ask that those of you who do understand to forgive my indulgence. NO I AM NOT A DEALER ( READ THE LISTING ) NO I WILL NOT FINANCE THE BRONCO ( READ THE LISTING ) NO I WILL NOT SELL YOU THE CARGO COVER. NO I WILL NOT SELL YOU THE SPARE TIRE COVER. NO I WILL NOT SELL YOU THE EDDIE BAUER FLOOR MATS. THE BRONCO IS BEING SOLD ENTIRELY COMPLETE! MY APOLOGIES IF I HAVE OFFENDED ANY REAL Ebay USER. BUT SERIOUSLY IF YOU CAN’T BUY A CLUE, HOW DO YOU EXPECT TO BUY ANYTHING ON Ebay.

The moral of this story? Always read the listing thoroughly before asking questions to¬† which the answers have already been provided. And also, do not offer less than half of what the seller is asking unless you end your offer with the words: “LOLs, just kidding!”

With files from Jalopnik

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