Man blasts 'remarkably stupid' eBay bidder in online rant
'Ladies and gentlemen ... This is how I answer a remarkably stupid question, please enjoy'
Anyone who has ever listed anything on Kijiji or eBay has experienced this: You state your price, you immediately get inundated with low bids and daft questions.
Occasionally, a clueless buyer pushes the wrong seller just a little too far. When that happens, it is awesome because the seller then unleashes a scalding public tongue-lashing and we all get to read it and say, “Oh snap!”
That’s exactly what happened when a buyer approached the seller of a 1996 Eddie Bauer Bronco, listed on eBay at $25,500.
The ensuing smackdown is featured on Jalopnik, whose writers note the seller was “getting some ridiculous questions” but that it was this one that finally set him off:
Q: Hello, I’m interested in your bronco. I’m worried about financing though because of the model year, can’t get a bank loan on a car this old. Would you consider $9000, I think I could pull that off.
To which the Bronco seller promptly and viciously replies:
A: Ladies and gentlemen for your reading pleasure. This is how I answer a remarkably stupid question, please enjoy. Let me see if I have this correctly. You want me to sell you my Bronco that has a buy it now price of $25,500 for $9,000. Because the most you think that you could pull off is $9,000. You must be a 20 something, in need of rehab, or are mentelly deficient. You obviously didn’t read the entire listing. That states and I quote ” you must have your cash or financing in place if you purchase this vehicle.” Whatever made you think that I would consider dropping my price by almost 65% when other Broncos with twice the mileage are selling between $13,000.00 and $17,000.00. It’s time for you to have a reality check. Not everyone is a winner. Not everyone gets a trophy, and just because you want something doesn’t mean that you can have it. I hope that this isn’t to subtle for you to comprehend. But if it is the answer is NO $9,000.00 won’t buy the Bronco. I have been getting some interesting questions about my Bronco. Most from people who for some reason can’t understand or fully read this listing. So I will attempt to answer for those individuals that lack the capacity to understand. I ask that those of you who do understand to forgive my indulgence. NO I AM NOT A DEALER ( READ THE LISTING ) NO I WILL NOT FINANCE THE BRONCO ( READ THE LISTING ) NO I WILL NOT SELL YOU THE CARGO COVER. NO I WILL NOT SELL YOU THE SPARE TIRE COVER. NO I WILL NOT SELL YOU THE EDDIE BAUER FLOOR MATS. THE BRONCO IS BEING SOLD ENTIRELY COMPLETE! MY APOLOGIES IF I HAVE OFFENDED ANY REAL Ebay USER. BUT SERIOUSLY IF YOU CAN’T BUY A CLUE, HOW DO YOU EXPECT TO BUY ANYTHING ON Ebay.
The moral of this story? Always read the listing thoroughly before asking questions to which the answers have already been provided. And also, do not offer less than half of what the seller is asking unless you end your offer with the words: “LOLs, just kidding!”
With files from Jalopnik