1999 Mercury Grand Marquis

By Jim Kenzie

A large, front engine, rear-drive luxury sedan.

Overhead camshaft V8 engine. Traction control. ABS brakes. Dual air bags.

Automatic air. Leather. Power everything. Built in an award winning plant.

Sound like the recipe for a Benz or a Bimmer?

Maybe. Until you note the mid-30s price tag and the fact that it's made in Canada.

Okay, so the Mercury Grand Marquis isn't a Benz or a Bimmer, but it's a pretty good car surely the cubic metre per dollar champ.

The Grand Marquis is perhaps best (and maybe most unfairly) known as the civilian version of the police car, since that and taxicab use are the most visible applications of its sister, the Ford Crown Victoria.

Changes made for the 1998 model year made the two cars better and easier to build.

Both cars now share the Mercury's Cpillar, the Crown Vic having lost its little quarter light window behind the rear door. Unique grilles, side trim and rear ends also help distinguish, even if the presence or absence of one or more lights on the roof may still be the most obvious marker (Fords

have 'em; Mercurys don't).

We'll concentrate on the Grand Marquis here.

It's an imposing looking beast, this car, but handsome in its own way. Nobody's going to laugh you out of the parking lot at the ritziest club in town.

My test car was the very unit Ford entered in the recent Automobile Journalists Association of Canada's Cars of the Year testing.

The Grand Marquis didn't win its category (luxury sedan) but neither did it embarrass itself in some pretty heady foreign company.

Everybody expects a car like this to provide huge amounts of room. No argument here, although the trunk's many litres of volume would be more usable if the spare tire weren't perched awkwardly on top of the shelf over the rear axle.

Six passenger room may be an optimistic claim in any car, and three up front is recommended only under dire circumstances, despite the presence of three seat belts.

Everyone expects all the modcons, and again, no surprise.

Set and forget air conditioning is welcome, since the cup holders in the ashtray block access to the climate controls.

Other conveniences include multi-way power seats (standard for the driver, optional for the passenger, cruise control and a tilt steering wheel.

And Ford's Premium sound system is still one of the best in the business.

My tester had the optional digital instrumentation. I thought we'd pretty much beaten this troll into the ground, but there are people who like it.

Among the many things I don't like is the fact that every readout is the same colour high beam, low fuel, payment overdue it's all green on black.

I've also never really gotten into trip computers. Maybe if you're hauling your Airstream down to Arizona and back every solstice they may seem like a better idea.

Everyone may expect effortless performance, unless they'd driven earlier versions of this engine.

Ford's 4.6 L V8, with a single overhead camshaft per bank of cylinders and two valves per pot, has always been stingy with torque and not particularly pleasant to rev high enough to extract decent acceleration.

The optional dual exhaust system bumps power and torque both by a count of 10 to 215 hp and 285 lbft and you can never have too much of either.

But perhaps more important in daily driving is the shorter (higher numerical) final drive axle ratio, which lets the engine spool up more quickly to deliver a considerably more zestful drive.

And the higher engine r.p.m. at cruising speed doesn't result in noticeably more engine noise or fuel consumption.

There is still a bit of hesitation in the three-four shift on this electronically managed four-speed autobox, but it's a significant improvement over older versions.

Everyone expects a car like this to ride like a cloud, and, to mix a metaphor, wallow like a pig.

The Grand Marquis rides smoothly enough, but my tester, equipped with the Precision Trac heavy-duty suspension package, didn't have the nausea inducing marshmallow feel of many cars of this ilk.

It's well snubbed, not floaty.

The biggest surprise to most AJAC testers came in the tight handling course. No pigs allowed here.

Precision Trac brings stiffer front coils, thicker sway bars, rear air springs with automatic self levelling, alloy wheels and beefier tires to go with the improved steering gear and Watt's linkage for the rear axle a pair of lateral arms joining the differential case to the frame which keep the axle following the front wheels in perfect alignment.

All this makes the big car respond well to the helm and cut a better swath through the twisties than you have any right to expect.

Cornering is nice and flat at high enough speeds that you will spill your coffee long before the tires start to squeal, which, let's face it, is the limit of the Laws of Physics for many drivers.

For a car that is otherwise so well suited to long distance motoring, the Grand Marquis doesn't have the tram straight tracking on the highway that I'd like.

The steering, while better than before, isn't the best in the field, and I found myself making lots of small corrections, especially in strong crosswinds.

Since this car is an exemplar of the road hugging weight school of car design, you might think it wouldn't be the least bit bothered.

My test car also had a trace of road noise, which may be attributable to the cupping tires undergo during even a few hard laps on a test track.

Another pleasant surprise was the evident quality of this car.

The robot fitted doors close with a vaultlike thunk. The fabrics and trim are of meritable standard and are nicely fitted. The car was squeak and rattlefree, remarkable considering its recent history at the track.

Some pseudo sophisticates will dismiss the Mercury Grand Marquis without even looking at it. If image is all, then this isn't your car.

Likewise, if you revel in the razorsharp reactions of the most finely tuned European sports sedans on a winding road that leads to nowhere and everywhere.

Then again, most people who drive Bimmers probably don't really get it either.

The price tag $35,195 for the well-equipped LS rose to $38,890 with just about every option available (not included is $940 for delivery) is another huge surprise, if you check out the domestic competition, like Buick Park Avenue or Chrysler LHS, both of which are frontdrive V6s.

One option the Grand Marquis still doesn't come with, to steal a line from Jean don't call me Linda mood Jennings of Automobile Magazine, is the de Sade option (black leather upholstery with silver studs, steering wheel made of welded chain).

Dave Savchez, manager of the Mercury Grand Marquis assembly plant in St. Thomas, declined comment on that . . .

Freelance journalist Jim Kenzie prepared this report based on driving experiences with a Grand Marquis provided by Ford of Canada. You can catch Kenzie each Sunday on Talk 640 Radio at 1 p.m.

Email: jbkenzie@interhop.net