SUVs are ideal for extreme parking

Security video of BMW SUV being driven over two cars in a Richmond Hill parking lot became a sensation when posted on YouTube

Nov 06, 2009

SPECIAL TO THE STAR

When I watched the recent YouTube video of a BMW X5 SUV being driven up onto – and then back down – a Hyundai Elantra and a Dodge Neon in a Richmond Hill parking lot, one thought went through my mind: wow. Awesome visual for BMW.

Most SUV owners never take their vehicles over anything more strenuous than the curb into a shopping mall. The exact figure is 99.4 per cent of owners who never go off-road. I just made that up, but you didn't even blink, so you know it's close to being true, at least anecdotally.

While part of the rugged advertising for rock climbers like Jeeps and Land Rovers is built around these vehicles performing astounding vertical feats, seeing that X5 go all monster truck on the smaller cars was shocking for that very reason: it's been hiding its inner wild child under a barrel.

The X5 performed with an almost balletic fluidity. While my guess is the driver – a 62-year-old woman – mistook the brake for the gas, that takes nothing away from the fact the truck did what it was supposed to when called upon. Of course the second best part of the tape is the stealth parking-lot-creep the driver does after the fact. I've seen my cat do this after nicking some chicken off a plate.

The ensuing charge, failure to remain , is a biggie. And this ain't hitting a squirrel. While I'm sure it's a topic for another day, I'm sick of drivers with no conscience, no inner compass telling them right from wrong. I'm sure if the woman had had her grandchild with her, that kid would have known they had no business just taking off. And parking-lot door bangers? This goes for you, too.

If she'd remained, I'm sure the ensuing explanation would have been entertaining. "Is there a reason, ma'am, that you embarked on a mission to drive your truck over two helpless vehicles?" asks my imaginary officer.

"I keep having dreams about Land Rovers," she wails. "I don't know what's wrong with me!"

But of course the more important lesson here is that vehicles with this kind of power and ability aren't needed to go to the gym. They aren't needed for shopping, for parallel parking, for going to church.

A driver unable to control a car is doing more than driving over parked cars; she is driving over her head, and endangering everyone else on the road. And this problem is not gender-based.

Hyundai Canada performed a nice public relations – and human – move and gave the Elantra owner a new car. As he'd just finished paying off the squished one, I can imagine his relief. In fact, I wanted to imagine his relief so much I flipped them an email telling them my van has a few scratches on it from an incident in a parking lot. I've been waiting all week for a new Genesis to arrive.

As for the folks at BMW, I'm sure their reaction is somewhat mixed.

It's like having your kid win the science fair, then flip the bird in the school picture.

Lorraine Sommerfeld's column appears Saturdays in Wheels. .

www.lorraineonline.ca

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